Thursday, November 19, 2009
I never thought I'll get so paranoid til this extend.
I think I've reached the Ultimate Extreme.
Im exhausted of crying all the time.
No, its not my baby's fault.
Im not blogging to seek sympathy from the world that I have a boyfriend who's not treating me right.
Instead, I feel that Im mentally tortuing him.
Fuck my braincells for always letting my imaginations go wild.
Seriously, I suck.
I feel insecure and always have thoughts like baby might left me anytime.
I honestly dont what know to do.
Yes, the simplest method to solve this whole stupid drama is to just have a lil more confidence in his feelings for me.
But no, its never that simple.
I instead have not much confidence that I'll forever have a place in his heart.
One day, he'll get sick of it.
And thats when I think I'll have sleepless nights and turn into a walking zombie.
I hope I can stop doing 'emo' post.
Really, I wanna post happy stuffs. Happy moments that baby and I shared.
But it seems like Im losing myself.
I dont know how many more times must he assure me.
God, would you please guide me through this?
Im really new to all these feelings.
'The silence isn't so bad,
Till I look at my hands and feel sad,
'Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly.'
